No where in-between


As I write my story. I feel many emotions. And the words just flood out of me. They don’t really represent any place that I am now. But they will always represent a place that I will always be. This one is for me when I was just turning twenty and over three decades later…

walking on glass

Like stepping  on glass, I test before I stand

but you jump right in not caring where you land

glass jumping

It’s all or nothing where ever you are concerned

I begin to wonder …. if I’ll ever learn

sad couple

I need to test the waters, before I jump back in

Just so you know…. I won’t go back to that place again

sad image of girl crying

That place where I left “me” behind

That place where you could seek but not find

more doors

I’ve found my footing and am on solid ground

I’ve been lost and now I’m found

Tara

I’m not sure if you’ll ever GET what I mean

but I’ll never again be stuck in your in-betweens.

Diane Reed

2013

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42 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Trackback: Ahhh Sunshine: Not Rain! | Plain Talk and Ordinary Wisdom
  2. Jim Gramze
    Aug 05, 2013 @ 16:54:07

    Absolutely love that first picture of the foot about to step on the broken glass. Very compelling as a message communicating the state of mind all by itself.

    Reply

    • coastalmom
      Aug 09, 2013 @ 13:15:41

      Thanks Jim! I think that sometimes I love the art in finding the perfect picture almost more than writing the words. I wonder…. if I started out with a picture first… hmmmm….? ;)

      Reply

  3. leveluphealth
    Aug 04, 2013 @ 07:11:46

    Your words are very touchy, and you are very strong. I am here for you if you ever need to talk or vent :)

    Your friend,
    Lucas

    Reply

  4. lifeofaministermom
    Jul 31, 2013 @ 12:07:05

    The raw and vivid emotions conveyed in your words never ceases to amaze me. Whatever you’re expressing, I always feel like I’m right there with you, in this case…breaking free!!

    Reply

    • coastalmom
      Aug 09, 2013 @ 13:21:53

      Patricia…
      Been on vacation for a while and tried to keep in touch via my smartphone but I always feel so much better being able to sit at my laptop and catch up! You my dear… always GET me where ever I am! Love our connection!
      xoxo

      Reply

  5. bowlingchef
    Jul 30, 2013 @ 17:28:10

    beautiful words and so true of all of us, along our journey’s we become lost, to which we wander aimlessly til we finally find ourselves, so we can continue our journey’s in happiness and confidence.

    Reply

  6. Carl D'Agostino
    Jul 30, 2013 @ 09:45:08

    Since there are transitions I suppose there will always be “in betweens”. But they are not a healthy place into which to be stuck.

    Reply

  7. DebbyGies
    Jul 30, 2013 @ 00:50:13

    Diane you should be putting together a book of your beautiful prose! xoDeb

    Reply

    • coastalmom
      Jul 30, 2013 @ 01:11:09

      Debby that is funny that you said that. I have been cutting and pasting a lot of my poems and putting them in my Word file.
      I already have a million poems stored in WORD but recently have been going straight to WordPress and writing them here so I’ve spent the last two days cutting and pasting a few at a time….
      But thanks! You are too sweet!
      I am impressed how you are on such a roll with your book! I need you to give me a good swift kick in the right direction!
      Hey by the way, I am reading a really good book by John Locke called How I sold a Million ebooks in five months!
      It’s quite informative! ;)

      Reply

  8. mimerajver
    Jul 29, 2013 @ 15:23:51

    I think I left a comment a couple of days ago but, just in case, here it goes again. Loved the combination of text and photos. The economy and depth of the lines touched my heart.

    Reply

    • coastalmom
      Jul 29, 2013 @ 18:55:36

      Mimerajver!
      Thank you so much! Did I not respond? I must go back and make sure I do! I always appreciate such kind feedback and the fact that you take the time to read! Sometimes I get 20 LIKES from the same person just seconds apart. NOT too sure what that is all about! LOL. So that makes me really appreciate when people actually read and then take the time to comment!
      By the way I do love finding pictures to fit the lines I try to convey. Sometimes…. I look at finding the perfect picture an art all of it’s own! Sooooo thankful for the great photographers out there!
      xoxo

      Reply

  9. Let's CUT the Crap!
    Jul 29, 2013 @ 12:25:28

    My take is you are never going to be second best anymore.
    This gives a tug to my heart. Nicely written and a nice pictorial journal,

    Reply

    • coastalmom
      Jul 29, 2013 @ 13:31:10

      The thing that prompted this poem actually happened over 30 years ago. I am writing about it in fictional form in way of my novel… using different characters etc… I need enough poems for the beginning of each chapter. I am playing around with an idea to either have a verse from each one or an entire poem so am trying to write them as I am in the moment while writing the “book”.
      So it is really nothing happening currently. Though not to share more in fear of the way I write becoming a spoiler for my book…. Some of my poems do refer to something I am currently struggling with but for the most part I write a lot inspired by the feelings I felt in my past…
      Though I do think that a lot of young people can relate to my poems because that is where I am when I write… back in my past. Not so much now… so all the peers my age… are kind of wondering what the heck is going on now in my life to cause me to write the recent poems I have written. Not to worry! You are right when I wrote this… at the time… I had finally decided I’d never be second best again. In that time in my life. I always felt as if he was waiting for someone better to come along. The funny thing is… I’ve talked to him since and he said nobody ever did and that I was “The ONE” who got away. And that he was just insecure and played a lot of games testing me. I’ve gotta say that is pretty validating now but it hurt like hell feeling “not good enough” back then…
      And so like Scarlett said… “As God as my witness; I will never be hungry again!” I think that is what I tried to convey here. Like you said… “I will never be second best.”

      Reply

  10. viveka
    Jul 29, 2013 @ 12:12:55

    “but I’ll never again be stuck in your in-betweens” – that is a very powerful statement and it tells me that you have made a bold decision – and that you going forward. I don’t know who’s in between’s you refer to, but feel that you know what you want and you know where you don’t want to be.
    I think the most important things for us all is that we are well aware of where we don’t want to be.
    Love your little poem and your choice of images is so fantastic.

    Reply

    • viveka
      Jul 29, 2013 @ 13:49:49

      Missed you too …. my mom passed away last month so I haven’t been very active online. By the way you look fantastic on your new profile photo, million dollars’ worth.
      Excellent photo and you look so happy.
      I hope that some of your worries have eased for you.

      Reply

      • coastalmom
        Jul 29, 2013 @ 13:57:11

        Oh Viv, I am so sorry. Big HUGS
        ((((((((((((((((((((((((((((VIV)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
        xoxo
        Diane

        Reply

        • viveka
          Jul 29, 2013 @ 14:07:15

          Diane, mom had become 91 last Saturday … she wanted to leave, she was very tired and she prepared me very well. She didn’t have much of a quality life in the end. Both her body and soul was longing for relief.

          Reply

          • coastalmom
            Jul 30, 2013 @ 18:20:14

            It is all very sad. But at the same time, a relief to know they aren’t suffering anymore. What a wonderful long life you had with her! May all the memories of the happiest times always be in the front of your heart!

            Reply

    • coastalmom
      Jul 29, 2013 @ 13:52:42

      Viv~
      I think I explained it all to : Lets Cut The Crap (above) best. Not really about anything now… but you know me so well… perhaps just a hint of “today” hidden in the strength of the message. I love what you said about the importance of not ever being where you don’t want to be!
      Thanks for reading! I’ve missed ya!
      xoxo

      Reply

  11. Yaz
    Jul 29, 2013 @ 05:52:04

    This is so heartfelt, Diane, I felt your determination (and anger almost?) myself. I think it triggered some ancient memories in me.

    Reply

    • coastalmom
      Jul 29, 2013 @ 13:41:04

      Yaz!!!! I have missed you!
      I think you are right about the anger ~ though I tried to explain this (somewhere above in my replies) somewhere else here that this poem was inspired by a blast from the past as I write my book. Kind of like how you said triggered some ancient memories. The inspiration for this was a lot from the archives of my memories! ;)
      So glad to have you back!
      xoxo

      Reply

  12. Five Quick Minutes
    Jul 29, 2013 @ 04:24:53

    All I would add is the old saying which says…”Never test the waters with both feet at the same time” love the new profile pic!

    Take care,
    Christian

    Reply

  13. PapaBear
    Jul 29, 2013 @ 00:56:55

    Di, I think it really takes -having been there- to understand what you’re saying. Been down that road and will never go there again. Good to see you out here again. Hugs, Paul

    Reply

  14. Anka
    Jul 29, 2013 @ 00:10:43

    Uh, the “stuck in-between” line pulled on my heartstrings! I cannot personally understand what you were going through as a twenty year old. But, it sounds like you’ve grown into a much stronger and confident woman today.

    Diane, I love reading about your past lessons because it helps me gain new wisdom for tomorrow. :)

    Reply

  15. grandfathersky
    Jul 28, 2013 @ 23:54:51

    Some never get it, though life will continue to show them the way …

    Reply

  16. Grndma Chris
    Jul 28, 2013 @ 23:41:44

    Very good, I totally enjoyed reading.

    Reply

  17. Sabrina Garie
    Jul 28, 2013 @ 23:16:50

    I love the way you weave words and pictures. It strengthens the emotional impact, makes the reader feel it across many senses. Thanks for dropping by my blog and introducing me to yours.

    Reply

  18. lifeoftransition
    Jul 28, 2013 @ 22:42:45

    Love the ideation. I get it, in my own way

    Reply

    • coastalmom
      Jul 28, 2013 @ 22:44:38

      Thank you! I think that every poem is allowed to be “owned” by the reader in whatever way their heart seems to “get” it! ;)
      Thanks for taking the time to read!
      xoxo

      Reply

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