Life is so short, and the older you get, you realize that it really does fly by. Five years ago today the father of my children died on his birthday. It was the year my daughter left for school. It was the year of so many beginnings and endings all jumbled into one. It marks a reminder for me just how short life is and yet for me it is but a blink of an eye.

All the emotions are so raw right now. I can close my eyes and be back to the day we first met and then fast forward to today. Babies have been born, lives have been lived with so much joy and sorrow, laughter and tears, ceremonies and celebrations, mistakes and forgiveness all sandwiched inbetween then and now.

For one thing our divorce!

And more importantly my wedding to my husband now. Almost twenty years ago. I am married to a wonderful man I now call my husband. And yet the guilt of our divorce has always been that one door I always left just slightly opened, marring the present.  Even though we became friends later in the years that followed, I never took those first vows lightly or forgave myself my own mistake. But in life, there really is no such things as do overs. Just grace to move on. And today, I think it is finally time. I need to finally let go and love the life and the ones still here.

Happy Birthday my love and old friend, Perhaps today I can finally say goodbye or maybe… just ….”until we meet again.”

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7 thoughts on “Happy Birthday Old friend, I miss you

    1. Eeeew! Maybe you can help me come up with the ending of my book when I get there! I am so stuck right now! I have 21 chapters written… and have started editing what I do have… hoping that by the time I get there, I will have a direction I want to go!

      1. It is my intent to give you feedback on your book and also to suggest where I think it should go. I’m hurrying as fast as I can. I know I can generate ideas for you but the question will be whether you want to use any of them. If I suggest something you may of course just use it, like this entry you altered. And I am hoping that even if you feel my ideas are dead wrong then that thought process will ultimately lead to where you do want to go.

  1. “But in life, there really is no such things as do overs. Just grace to move on.”
    What a great insight.
    Apparently you aren’t the only one writing about an old hurt today.

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