The first time I noticed it, I was in the shower washing my face. I had purchased a new cleanser. It was a light green package with white writing on it. I was not sure if it was the water in my eyes or the small white print, but I decided that NO ONE could possibly read the instructions on that stupid package! Well, a few days later, I decided to pick up a pair of what my dad called “cheater readers” at the drug store and through those lenses I saw clearly. My heart dropped as I purchased a pair and felt very old. That was the first sign of old age. I had not appreciated my youth as much as I should have.

Today, as I walk down the stairs, I creak, when I get up after sitting for a while, it’s not so easy, my double jointed body is not so flexible and even though I have begun jogging again when no one is looking, I don’t think I will ever jump hurdles again. Nope, not even maybe. And back pain is just not something my mom tells me about. I am old. I am that older lady who gave me advice, once upon a time not too long ago, about appreciating my babies who have since grown up!

Time passes so quickly. I remember hearing about the aches and pains of the older artists that I did shows with, and thinking I would NEVER complain like that. I try not to, but NOW  I know what they were talking about! One decade you are wearing size 8 and the next, you are not! What happened? I have learned that it is life. But what do they say? fifty is the new forty? And sixty is the new fifty? Okay well that puts me in the mid forties! And I know, I know, age is just a number. But I have to admit, I am having trouble getting pumped up again. I have my floods of inspiration from time to time, and get on a roll and then slowly, go backwards again. Due to depression or just the negative way I look at things. But I guess if those cheater readers are going to help me see~ then so be it.

Recently, after going all the way up to 35o in the number on my last pair, I relented and went and got a perscription. I guess I was so bad that my doctor told me that if I had gotten in an accident, they could have sued me! They gave me a pretty blue case with a special cleaning spray and cloth and sent me on my way. And oh my, I must say that cleaning REAL glasses puts a much better slant on my view of things. Those cheater readers never seemed as clean as I can get the glass on my new pair.

Maybe there is a little lesson in that. Sometimes we fight and resist the things we know will help us and keep blindly going along until we just can’t anymore. We have two choices, to remain in the fog or reach out.  Finding God again has done that for me. Every verse has new meaning. Every story, a different lesson. And slowly, sometimes very slowly, I am beginning to see things a little more clearly. Who knew that my drawer full of cheater readers that I had lying all over my house could be replaced with one little pair.

Even after Jesus had done all these miraculous signs in their presence, they still would not believe in him.  This was to fulfill the word of Isaiah the prophet: “Lord, who has believed our message and to whom has the arm of the Lord been revealed?”  For this reason they could not believe, because, as Isaiah says elsewhere:  “He has blinded their eyes and deadened their hearts, so they can neither see with their eyes, nor understand with their hearts, nor turn–and I would heal them.”  Isaiah said this because he saw Jesus’ glory and spoke about him.  Yet at the same time many even among the leaders believed in him. But because of the Pharisees they would not confess their faith for fear they would be put out of the synagogue;  for they loved praise from men more than praise from God.
John 12:37-43
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6 thoughts on “Cheater Readers

  1. I sometimes have a hard time getting up off the couch or out of bed if I laid too long in the wrong position. That damned disc in my back! With the dropped weight I get around just fine but I sure don’t like to do deep knee bends and then try to get up!

    On FG, there is a blog that has not been removed:

    http://musingsofanamericangirl.wordpress.com/

    I will wait for a posting after the 17th of this month with anticipation.

    1. Ahhh thanks I was worried about her. The way she writes… bothers me a lot but she is such an excellent writer. I was feeling like Oh no…. I didn’t want to take your time away from her and then for her to actually leave… Though I am sure I am giving us both too much credit for that to matter that much in her life… I mean my blog is important but it is not my life nor do I suspect hers. But… I haven’t read a post of hers for a while. So thanks for that link… Is that her? I am confused… I just went there and I saw that she commented there. ??
      Yeah, I know… I haven’t been to a dr. for a while but my back does the same thing… could be a disk… but when I am at a lower weight… it definitely aleviates a lot of pain anywhere on me! 😉

      1. That is her blog. She even re-blogged one of my articles there, the one on gay marriage.

        A credit to her writing is the difference in style with the one I linked to as opposed to the one we are used to reading. Her other blogs where she is “Slave Girl Leonorah” as a “submissive” as opposed to a “dominant” person is more sexually based and includes erotic fiction as written by her — I peeked and decided the whole thing was not for me. She expressed shame when I let her know I glanced at that blog and I told her I didn’t care and that it was merely something that didn’t interest me. The Flat Girl was submissive as she dutifully did requests such as listing 10 positive things about herself, doing as told. “The Musings of an American Girl” is very different and definitely right wing politically, but it was listed on her Gravitar as one of her blogs and, like I said, one of my articles is re-blogged there. The evidence is clear.

        I do hope she is OK. Time will tell.

        1. This is a wierd world. I am impressed with her writing but I have to admit that the whole thing creeps me out a bit. Not knowing who people are. Really? I mean seriously, the fantasy relationships that some people have with someone who is supposed to be this person but has several other blogs? And the more techiee you are the more you can do… who knows she could be a he for all we know and all the stories could be made up. That is why I finally had to meet my old friend I think… It all just seemed so not reality just talking on the Internet….until we met that is and then it was too late. It was very real…But my point is I guess (yeah what is her point you are thinking…lol) that how do we know anyone? I mean have you heard of catfish? Freaky!!!! I tend to care about people but in this case there is just something off. I had a gal from this blog call me and have a total meltdown. I had only known her from her blogs for a few weeks and she said things to me that I would never say to my best friends… I still can’t get that call out of my head… But she made me really care about her and especially her kids because they were supposedly in the next room while their mom was totally freaking out. My heart broke for them. And now it makes me wonder about everyone here… who is real and who is not?????????????

          1. I take everyone at face value until I know differently. I would never open my pocketbook for anyone online and have learned not to do it for family or friends unless I intend it as a gift. One learns the hard way. All the court cases on TV — Judge Judy, et al — are almost exclusively friends and/or relatives that are settling disputes about loans or similar things. Strange that I will help out strangers with a loan more so than someone I really think I know. But I feel more free to enforce the loan legally if there is no strong personal connection. Weird.

            I do think I know someone in your area, definitely have friends in San Jose. Their daughter married and is now living in your city if I have that right. I don’t keep my personal information nearly as private as I should. So far, no regrets.

            1. It is a small world. I do know when my “friend reconnection” said that his territory moved North to Paso… I panicked and got territorial myself….I was like “and how did you manage that”? and he was offended that I would think that he had anything to do with it. But… I trust no one these days. 😉

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