reading computer screen

I am having another one of my reflective mornings,  with a mug of coffee, watching as the fog tethers over the road in front of my window. I think that I have shared with you that I live near a lake in a gated community. In the summer it can be very busy as boats are pulled in and out and I love it. There is just something about the hustle and bustle of  people living life that makes me happy and I don’t mind living so close to the gate (we are right on the corner.) But my very favorite view, if I could choose is that of twinkling lights of a city and a bridge at night. Watching the world below live their individual lives is kind of comforting to me. But today it is a quiet morning and I just felt the need to check in. Because the hustle and bustle of my own life has me missing out on this side of the bridge so to speak!

city view with bridge

I have not been writing or for that matter, reading a lot here lately and have found that when that happens, my sweet loyal followers still faithfully check in and I know we are a kind of cyber family.  You KNOW who you are! We (hopefully) will always be each other’s inspire-ers and eventually find our way back to one another’s door steps, cyberly or not.  But the others fall off. There is a kind of networking mentality among us here… “I will read yours, if you will read mine.”  And slowly, if your life becomes busy and you don’t  comment or at least “LIKE” all of their posts regularly, they tend to move on. (I just find that so sad. I read when I have time and love to find new bloggers to encourage.) And then there are others that are still just finding me trickle in and it feels good that something is working.

like thumb

Soooo even though this is a soft place to fall, for me… it takes work and I do notice the numbers. As with anything, you make a deposit and you can make a withdrawal. That’s just how it works. You get what you put in. Though there are always those friends that give without expecting anything in return and I am so blessed as I recognize who you are. And strive to be like you!

And how could I miss an opportunity for a good  metaphor? (Ya gotta have seen this one!)     There is Someone else who is always there, … HE is just waiting for me to talk to HIM but whether I do or not, remains ever so faithful and is always there, never moving on. How blessed are we to have HIM as our friend? A constant soft place, whether we check in or not, HE is always there waiting for our next “post.” And ALWAYS to follow HIM!

jesus praying hands

As far as this blog, I started writing here as a place to store my book and my poetry. So it surprised me when one reader started reading and seriously critiquing my first posts. (If you look back you will see in the comments that I was a little taken aback, until I actually began to look forward to those comments.) At first it was annoying, and then I found it pretty affirming. That someone took time out of their day to read every post I’d write. Our friendship kind of evolved. And then abruptly stopped. I think there was a kind of a pattern there that had nothing to do with me… but it made me aware that other people might actually read what I wrote. And to also go out and read other’s posts. I discovered kindred spirits and an amazing little family of validation and affirmation and really have learned to not only admire other writers but love and care about you guys!

blog readers

In my life I have learned that at times in life, everyone is lonely, sad, angry, easily offended,  and that the most annoying and prideful, boasters are usually the most insecure. But I’ve  also been taught great lessons by the  forgivers and joy seekers, the ones that don’t notice the wrong in everyone, the ones that don’t judge, the ones that share their own stories to build others up and to help us know that we really are not alone… the ones that  make me have something to strive for, to always be better.

And it is here that I have discovered greatness.



49 thoughts on “I will read yours if you you will read mine… Really?

  1. Lovely post! Very honest, insightful, and inspiring. I love to visit my online friends and read their posts because I’m interested in what they have to say, I love their stories, photography, poems, or I want to see what they’re up to and then there are those few instances when I come across a person’s blog who has not visited my blog ever although I’ve visited their blog many times and have left many comments and it makes me feel like, why do they feel that’s okay? We all want our blogs visited, our posts read, and likes and comments. Why would anyone bother to take the time and effort to write a post if they’re not expecting anyone to read it? That’s why I don’t understand why some people feel entitled to receive visitors, comments, and likes but yet don’t feel any obligation to return the favor once in a while. We should have a networking mentality (to some degree) that’s what blogging and social media is all about. We should also be considerate toward one another. If someone is on vacation, sick or has some kind of family/work situation and he/she can’t read posts for a while I would certainly understand and I wouldn’t abandon that person. We all have busy times in our lives when we are not able to get online as often as we’d like that’s no reason to drop someone.

    1. Vashti!!!!
      So good to see you! I just saw this when I went on to post something new. Not sure how I missed it. But with smart phones changing I am missing a lot since I changed to my iphone!
      I think you kind of nailed it. It is kind of like anything… if you have a store front but are constantly closed, people begin to stop coming by to see if you’re open. I guess I’ve always kind of felt that it would be nice that if someone who messaged me to tell me that they missed my writing would go back and read the hundred posts or so I wrote before anyone knew I was here,
      it would be the best of both worlds. But like anything you have to work it! I have discovered writers that I have especially liked and spent a lot of time reading in their archives. I just wish that there was a way to remind people that most of us have a lot tucked away in our archives. But you are right about the mentality. I think we just lose track of people who aren’t as active or when I am not as active I know I fall into the same category. Though I know that I have people who I’d read regularly who don’t write any longer but still have their page active and I will ask how they are doing. Some respond, some don’t. I know I lose half of my readers when I don’t write at least weekly and it is pretty much like life… you just have to work it! Thanks for taking the time to write such a thoughtful reply!

  2. Hey.. I miss you! It has been too long. I try to keep up with you via FB.. Love you my friend. Keep writing for man kind needs it and you!

    1. YOU are so sweet! Not sure about needing me… lol.. but love your heart for saying so! I stop in with you too. to check on your life. Glad we connected. I know you haven’t posted for a couple of years but you are a keeper! And such an inspire-er!
      I love you back!

  3. Diane,
    I was so blessed to see “One Thing I Know For Sure” in my inbox today. I too have missed perusing your posts and admiring your candid stories. I enjoyed every chapter of your book you posted here and have often wondered how that effort was going. I haven’t seen a like or comment from you in awhile. I know you have been busy, much like me (being a co-parent to two granddaughters (6 and 3) five days a week). I always look forward to reading about Coastalmom’s life and experiences. I look forward to reading more here and hope you continue to bless me and others with your insight and walk with Jesus.
    Hey, I’ll make you a deal. I’ll read yours if you read mine. Okay? (+; Great to read your stuff again. Take care. God bless.

    1. Steve,
      That is so weird. I never stopped following you. I am not sure how if you didn’t see my posts that happened and now you do? Maybe it is wordpress. I too used to get your posts regularly and I haven’t heard from you for so long, I even went and looked for your site when you were going through a crisis and commented on a few things and didn’t hear from you so thought it was a choice. And recently went looking for you and you deleted your blog? I was so sad to not be able to find you! I guess it is more than a choice sometimes, maybe we have to work harder here to keep in touch? Good for me to realize Life is busy fo all of us. I’ve been making my parents as many meals as possible per week now that my mom can’t, working full time and my hubby usually has plans for me at least one of my days off. And now planning my baby’s wedding! So I think this is a good lesson for me to not just assume so others don’t assume that I don’t care!
      Hugs! Glad you told me!
      You are always in my prayers!

      1. WOW! I didn’t know that happened. The mess up was entirely my fault. I thought I’d be clever and set up Google’s new email format that arranged my messages in categories. I did something and suddenly your posts were not there, nor were posts from several others I read daily. It took me months to figure out why I wasn’t getting regular notifications from you and the others. I asked email guru friends to try to figure it out. Finally one of the gurus figured out what I was doing wrong. Now I’m back on track with you, thank goodness, and the other posts I most admire and look forward to reading.
        I’m also staying on top of responding to comments now. I discovered that many emails with comments got dumped in an obscure sub-folder I rarely accessed. Thank you so much for your prayers.Thank you, my faithful friend. I’m glad we can now remain in touch. I’m eager to hear how your writing is going. It seems you may be caught in that whirlwind we call life. Me too. But I thoroughly enjoy our friendship and our prayers for each other and look forward to staying in touch. I’d love to catch you up on my adventures as a 69-year-old co-parent to two beautiful granddaughters (6 and 3) and other fun stuff, like me losing hearing in my left ear permanently on my birthday (December 23). Oh yeah!
        Can we catch up? Look forward to hearing from you.

        Hugs back to you.
        You will be in my prayers as well.

  4. Hi Diane….just stopping by to say hello and do some reading. Know you are involved with so many things lately including the wedding of your precious daughter. Miss you and your family bunches..and long to see you.
    Like you..we too are taking care of family members just putting one foot in front of the other and getting through the days. There are times when I long to grab a coffee and talk with you about certain things and everything and very much look forward to when we can do it again….

    1. Ahhh Leslie,
      I am so glad to hear from you! I think about you daily and still have living near you on my bucket list! No doubt Jamie has prepared some homes next to each other for us! But I would love to do it here too! Ya know? We had such a sweet friendship and your life and wisdom has been such a blessing to me. I am touched to find you here. It means so much to think that you stop by! I love you guys and miss our friendship. But love that time and miles can’t keep it from being special any ways!!!! xoxo Wish you lived closer! We’d have a blast at this wedding! So hard to believe that Jennie caught my bouquet! And Brooke won’t be throwing one… She thinks it is tacky and politically incorrect! LOL. 🙂

  5. I have just discovered this wonderful world of blogging in the past year. Your posts have been very inspirational to me and your words of encouragement are most appreciated. This world of blogging has its ups and downs but it never ceases to amaze me the connections and thoughtful interactions that take place over time and unimaginable distances. Keep doing what you do, because it matters to me and so many others.

    1. Kristen!
      Thank you so much for taking the time to stop in and share. I am so glad that you found this blogging world and that we connected. I am blessed. This post made me realize this IS what it’s all about!

  6. I don’t know about anyone else but when I started out blogging, I went gangbusters! I was constantly spouting everything from stories to nuggets of new-found wisdom. And then, one thing hit in life – and then another. And before you knew it, I was zapped – bone dry! I became guarded and unwilling to make myself vulnerable as I worked through my rough patches. I then began to feel (and I know this not a good thing, nor is it the truth), that I was not in a place to be able to encourage or help anyone else, as I, myself, was stewing in sadness and perceived failure. I say all that to say that while it may appear that some are pulling away from their blog buddies or their blog altogether, their lack of activity on their blog is often an indication that they are struggling and being vulnerable, at least for me, is the first area to cover when that happens. I love your writings – we have always clicked. I am blessed by your sharing, for you, in your own vulnerabilities, have nudged me over the line of “safety” many times. My presence on WordPress has dramatically dwindled but I firmly believe that this season of personal reflection and growth will result in great inspiration and that the ink will begin to flow once again!

    1. Tina,
      The reason I love you is your honesty. I will always click with you. You are who I’d seek out as a friend at work or in my life.
      I know what you mean about going through dry insecure times! i love the friends that stick it out and around anyway ❤️ Thank you for sharing 💕

  7. Diane, In a way, The One Thing I Know For Sure, is a place where honesty can always be found, and a woman’s heart is opened for all to see. The roots, the buds, the flowers and the fruit. As Mary Oliver said – and the downfall of the apple is its ripeness… There are times I’ve slid through post, and there are times I’ve relished them, but always her truth draws me back … Cheers!

    1. Diana,
      YOU are so kind to share that with me. I am blessed to have you pop in whenever you can! It means a lot and it doesn’t go unnoticed! I am always happy to see you here! Thank you for sharing. It means so much!

  8. I always look forward to seeing your name and knowing that an interesting or amusing blog is soon to be read! I for one only follow blogs that reflect my views and some that are a little different. I also find that I learn things from other people’s blogs that may help me and my blog. So I may read some for awhile, then stop following them, there are others like yours thatcI will probably always follow. Hugs!!

  9. Hello my friend. Nice to see you pop in. I love this post and I do believe that friends will always come back. Like you said, many people have a lot going on in their lives and also don’t always have the time to read or respond to our posts, but we make those efforts when we can. ❤

    1. Debbie,
      You are part of the family always. I have prided myself in always setting everyone free, loving the relationships that you can just start right up where you left off. I have a lot of those kind of friendships. You included. I just realized that I hadn’t come to visit your blog for a while so go figure… YOU could be thinking “what’s with her?” BECAUSE I saw something was up with your hubby!???? Praying!!!! Do stop by for a chat when you have time!

      1. Thank you my friend. I may stray, but I always come back to my friends. And like you said, ‘real friends’ pick up where they left off.
        Thanks for the prayers. Hub is home once again after another 911 call Easter weekend. He’s not out of the woods yet, but at least he’s home. I’m so behind in real life duties, let alone writing and blogs, but I’ve learned how to live ‘one day at a time’ for now.
        Hoping you are well and happy. Love Deb xoxo

  10. It’s true, there are always the “diehards,” and then the ones who are there, but comment infrequently, and when they do, it’s always a blessing. And whoever comes around or doesn’t, we are still moved by the Spirit to write because we can’t NOT write.

    And the metaphor was SO very appropriate. 🙂

    1. Susan you are right!!!! We can’t not write so we should just enjoy the people that keep coming back. I think I was feeling guilty because I don’t feel like a very good cyber friend. It’s funny, I knew that I had been pretty bad about keeping up but I am realizing that I am one of the ones and it’s mainly because my life has been so full… I think that it’s not so much out of sight out of mind… it’s we are all on the same path. I am just blessed by the ones that still take the time to stop by when they can!
      And thanks for saying that about the metaphor… Our Lord is good for never keeping track of the lack of deposits I make, and still giving me a place to belong! Only if we could all be so forgiving!!!! HE is our best example!
      Thank you Susan for taking the time to read and share!

  11. Hi, I enjoy your blog when you write, but I don’t expect people to read my blog just because I read theirs. At the same time, it is nice to support each other. I also think we attract by the topics we write and sometimes we write and sometimes we read. It is nice to know I am not alone in this feeling of desiring connections but also busy life to find it hard to post all the time. Blessing on you with your writing!

    1. Cherilyn,
      I thank you! This kind of backfired. I was trying to thank my faithful readers, the ones like you who just read to read. And just to say that I noticed that since I’ve been lazy about writing, when I do… I lost some of my old followers and I noticed it. But it sounds like I expect everyone to read mine if I don’t read theirs and that’s not what I mean. ARGH! I just see the process has been very telling. Just like my Etsy you have to work it. Or there are some that lose interest.. and there are some that actually read yours only when you read theirs. I guess what I was trying to point out is that there are those that read my posts whenever I post whether I read theirs or not… and I have not read a lot of blogs for a long while… and I there is an obvious absence of a few in particular that I considered good friends… is what I guess I was trying to say.

    1. Jennifer,
      And I am so glad we met here too! I feel as if a lot of the friends I have made here are just as special as the ones I meet for coffee and grab time together!

  12. I read your blog because it touches something in me. It brings me joy and often makes me think seriously about something. I don’t expect you to read my blog simply because I read yours. if you do enjoy my blog then I’m pleased and thankful, but it is not required nor is it expected. I feel sorry for those who live their lives within a tally board. When you don’t write I do miss you but I live in the expectation that you will soon return. No one should be forced to do something that they don’t want to. As long as you keep writing I will keep reading.

    1. Wow Quiall,
      Profound wisdom. I feel pretty small having even brought this issue up, after reading your comment. You are so right. I wish everyone felt that way. Maybe it is just when I read their blogs it makes them remember to come see what I have posted. Who knows. Not sure it matters. It’s just that these last several months I have had so much on my plate… I noticed that I’ve lost about half of my readers. I didn’t expect that so it made me notice. I wish I hadn’t noticed… but I am always writing about what is in my head at the moment! (HOW embarrassing! LOL.)
      I love your blog and I am not always great about reading all the time. I am glad you read mine and you are one of the faithful readers I was talking about!

    1. Jennifer!
      Always my faithful reader! YOU are valued! I guess this post kind of backfired. My main objective was to let the ones like you know how much I appreciated you! Now rereading it, (YIKES) it sounds a little whiney! 😮

  13. It’s hard to not take it personally, Diane.
    I think the pattern goes something like this: people start blogging and get followers and begin following other blogs. Eventually they follow too many blogs to keep up with – reading them all would be like reading War and Peace every day 🙂 The whole blogging world becomes overwhelming.
    Thank you for being one of my first and most faithful and encouraging followers.

    1. Bill,
      You make me laugh! THAT’s IT exactly! It does get overwhelming and we do tend to follow too many bloggers! And it is like reading War & Peace if we tried to keep up! I wish that I could go back to not realizing that other people were reading what I wrote and just writing for me when I needed the therapy of writing. But now I am stuck noticing the numbers! ARGHHHH!
      You are so easy to follow! I am honored to be one of your first readers! And even yours (who is one of my probably favorites of all times) I see that I’ve missed reading a few recently!

      1. Has the number of your followers been decreasing? If yes, I assume that some of your early followers, people that don’t blog anymore, have deleted their blogs. I doubt very much that people have stopped following you.

        1. You are probably right! It is interesting. I think that I started out trying to appreciate you guys that are true blue always there and it turned out like a whiney complaint, which wasn’t what I intended, but rereading this… it sounds BAD! LOL.

  14. I try not to let things like that bother me. I first started blogging so I could write, having people actually follow and comment was a bonus and gift to me. But I know what you’re saying. Once you have regular commenters it kinda hurts when they stop coming around.

    My dad passed away in November and my ‘reading and writing of blogs’ became less and less even before he died because I was so worried about him – I had to conserve my energy. I was keeping my activities to only the things I really needed to do. Some who were my top commenters disappeared all together, some did not even learn my dad passed away because of it.

    When all is said and done, I am still commenting less than I used to. I do try to read at 3 posts a day, but I follow hundreds of blogs, so as you can imagine, I don’t read every post from every blogger every day. I, like you, am grateful to those who have stuck by me and I still love and read, like and comment on the posts of those who have dropped off when I get a chance. ❤
    Diana xo

    1. Diana,
      So sorry about your dad! I know it is so hard to read everyone’s post and also keep up with writing our own posts. I’ve been trying to cook dinners for my parents several days a week, now that my mom can’t anymore, along with working full time and planning my daughter’s wedding (the shower is next and I am throwing it with my best friend) so that has really cut my posting and reading time down.. And as I shared, I also began posting, never even considering anyone would ever read what I wrote. I probably would have made it private if I’d been less technically challenged. LOL. It is funny, going back to my very first posts, no one read them. I didn’t even think about it. And then slowly they did. Not sure how. But they did. And I’ve made a lot of friends that just read and some that posted as well. And as a writer, it did make me notice the patterns. The ones people responded to more etc… I think if we are all honest, we notice. But try not to let it affect us. This was just kind of a reflection on what I’ve noticed. I still really write for me. I sometimes used to write daily. It just isn’t possible anymore. But I do try to go find some of the ones I have missed and read their blogs when I can.
      Thanks for taking the time to read and comment. Obviously it must matter to me. LOL.

  15. So true my cyber writing friend, love your words, hope you the same for my words.

    ” Anybody can write words, but to create the right words takes a true Artist”

    # we all have thoughts rolling in our heads, but it takes a true writer to unscramble the thoughts and write the right words”

    1. Bowlingchef!
      YOU are one of the die-hards…. Fiercely loyal! So appreciate you! And LOVE your words as well!!!! Not as good as you are in being so on top of responding, but when I can, you are a fav! Always making me think!

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