View of the Peninsula from the cliffs of Rancho Palos Verdes
I have learned that checking off the things on my BUCKET LIST and really actually following through, can take me waaaay out of my comfort zone. So when we started planning our little YaYa weekend, it was fun to hop on board the planning train but when we actually seemed to have to say if we were “IN” I panicked. It is one thing, posting the more flattering pictures of ourselves and sharing only the happiest of times, on our Facebook pages than actually spending a few days with our special old friends that we have connected with. Facebook is a funny thing. It allows us to paint a picture of just the things we want to share. You share bits of your vacations and funny or uplifting things, you over share pics of your kids and then grand kids expecting everyone else to find them just as amazing as you do. But you don’t share your mistakes and regrets and definitely not your fat pictures! Sooooo agreeing to share four full days with friends you have not seen for forty years is a bit out of my comfort zone! But to my surprise I agreed. And I am from the old school… if you commit to something, you follow through.
Since I lived the closest, I volunteered to drive down with my car so we wouldn’t have to rent one and I’d be the designated driver. As I picked each old friend up from the airport, we thankfully just slipped right back into a comfortable place that must have been especially preserved for this exact occasion. There is a different kind of appreciation for friendships that have out-lasted almost a half of a century. And it was funny, each friend had a special place in my heart. Especially in the re-connection as we bonded through messages. As we shared our stories, it was different than when we were kids. As High School friends we thought we knew EVERYTHING about each other back then, but we really didn’t. It was nice to share and listen to one another’s stories of our triumphs and failures, and just all of our history that came in-between forty years.
We spent hours catching up. Each having our own stories of joys and heartbreaks that life brings. All of us coming into our own with the wisdom of our experiences. One thing I know we kept commenting on was how privileged we were to grow up in such a beautiful place and wondering if we really appreciated it back then as much as we do now. I think we all just took living so close to the ocean for granted back then. This weekend we spent a lot of time on a memory tour. We visited each of our old houses and all the places that held special memories for us. Our parents were a big part of a lot of our memories, especially the ones no longer here. We all recognized their mistakes maybe more openly than ever before, but could appreciate where they came from and loved them for the good they brought to our lives. Hopefully our kids will do the same for us someday, forgiving our mistakes and appreciating our efforts. For I know that I’ve made many mistakes in my lifetime, but I think this trip helped me to let go of what I cannot change. We tried to stay away from the obvious stuff, politics, religion, etc. Funny though, we all met at church and were part of a youth group. The only thing I shared was through all of my ups and downs, mistakes and heartbreaks, I’m not sure I could have survived without my faith. I KNOW I couldn’t have.
I think what I took away from this experience was that we need to really realize when we are happy. To live in the moment. And as my daughter has taught me, to not always have to take a picture, to put your camera away and just live in the moment and embrace it. Even if for a second. To forget about the past or the future. To forget about the finances and the ailments, to forget about what may be or what may not be and to really just take a picture in our heart of the seconds we are feeling happy. When I went to Seattle a few months ago with my daughter (a BIGGIE checked off of my bucket list) and we were all standing in our grandparent’s home. I felt it. The acknowledgment of the moment! I remember thinking… “I am standing in my grandma’s house! WITH the two people who can reeeeally understand how much it means to me. Because they made it happen! I think I knew that this last weekend was important for all of us, for so many reasons and we needed to make it happen. I remember several moments that I embraced that feeling of being happy in those seconds and really acknowledging it. And you know, we don’t need to go on a trip to find it. Sometimes it is just spending time with your kids or husband or going out to lunch with a friend or finding that perfect song on the radio and singing your heart out and really just deciding to be happy. Being older brings a wisdom of appreciation that we lack in our youth. and being okay in our own skin. I loved that we were all happily married or happily single. We loved our kids or were perfectly fine not having kids. Those of us who had grand kids really were finally into being grandmas. Whatever it was, was. And as I get older, I’m not as sad as I used to be when something is over because I had a part in making it happen and now I have the memories!
The Four YaYas at our favorite Restaurant…. The Admiral Ristys in PV
(I’m the one on the right.)
19 thoughts on “The acknowledgment of the moment”
Your stories are so moving with a universal theme that is inspiring to me and others. I truly enjoy reminders of the important things in life especially when written so beautifully. Thank you for sharing.
Thank you for such an inpiring comment! I am always blown away by the people who even take the time to just read my ramblings. Let alone, sit down to comment on them. You are one of the ones behind the motivation that keeps me writing! xoxo
Over the years, I have also been the one ‘always behind the camera’. Hmmm.
Me too!!!! That is why my daughter has told me… “Mama put down the camera and enjoy the moment we are in and take a picture with your heart or you are going to miss it altogether!”
Ahhh the wisdom of our children.
That is so sweet and she is right-on. The thousands of family photos over the years have created a great record of our family but in looking back … where is the record of me ~ Oh dear. On one hand, I don’t want next generations to ‘have to’ ask, “but where is Grammy?” My next thought was that it wouldn’t occur to anyone to ask, “where was Grammy?” Oh dear. Meantime, as your daughter said, I need to put down the camera, enjoy the moment and capture life today. Not let it pass me by unnoticed. Blessings!
LOL…. too crazy! I would have thought I wonder if anyone would have asked where I was too! Are we soul sisters or what?!
AND that you admitted it! I think that is why people gravitate to our blogs; (or at least we gravitate to each other’s) 🙂 because they know they’ll get our honesty and we allow ourselves to show our vulnerability. I think a lot of people like to feel that they are not the only ones feeling these things! lol.
Yes, I think we are soul sisters! You have no idea how many of your blogs I relate to. Yes, honest and vulnerable – oh my! Only have a moment but have you seen on Proverbs21 devotional site? Blog re: books, ‘Doing Busy Better’ by Glynnis Whitwer and ‘From Hot Mess to Blessed’ by Julie K Gillies? I must check these out. Blessings!
Proverbs31 Ministries website is what I meant to type ~
Just looked it up! Thank you!
This post was very touching. Multiple points hit home for me. “To Live in the Moment” is one of them. About 25 years ago, I realized that I had a habit of looking forward to the next goal, not enjoying the moment, not appreciating the blessings, then later looking back and yearning for those various places and moments in time. I try to keep reminding myself to enjoy where I am right now. One example is if I had only been satisfied, when I was younger, instead of always wanting to lose 5 more lbs. As I got older, I would think, if I had only been satisfied 25 lbs. ago! And on it goes. Thank you for this beautiful, insightful post!
YOU my dear, must be the one on the other side of my mirror (you know how you always wonder who is she, that one on the other side of the looking glass? lol… just kidding!) But you and I think so much alike that it’s uncanny. I also look back and think wow. I wish I’d appreciated that I was that size, or looked like that when I did.
And I am constantly in need of something to look forward to. I’ve even caught myself thinking when I am in a happy place…. “This will all be over soon… then what?” If I don’t have another thing planned.
And finally realized the older I’ve gotten how much good times I’ve wasted by always looking forward.
So glad we crossed paths!
Glad to hear from you, Diane! I agree. I’ve been amazed when reading your posts at how much we seem to think alike. I too am grateful that we have crossed paths and look forward to what God has planned. Blessings! xoxo
I recently had my son and family over from Canada and so had lots of fun times and there were lots of photos but one night we put the camera away because as you say sometimes it is best “to not always have to take a picture, to put your camera away and just live in the moment and embrace it” … and we did.
That is so neat. To recognize the need to capture the moment and take the pictures in your head as memories. I will always need a few photos just because…. But with our cell phones also our cameras and access to social media, it really is too easy to get lost in trying to capture the moment than living it. So I am with you! So glad you enjoyed your visit! (So good to see you!)
” the bucket is just a bucket that becomes full of things you want and hopefully do, what that bucket mostly does is, gets us more disappointed as we don’t get to all within the bucket”.
” yes Facebook is good when we want to share the good with each other, but unfortunately some use this social media to destroy each other, some to project a fake self to others and still some to spread unwanted drama toward each other”.
My Bucket List is all just a metaphoric way of me referring to a happy memory. I don’t really have alist somewhere. Lol.
So sorry you have had bad experiences on Facebook. I think being older, I don’t have the drama of what you described. It did get me in trouble once upon a time… reconnecting with someone that had been trying to find me for years. I shouldn’t have opened that door. But only regret the people hurt by it. I think I am who I am now because I opened it. So no regrets…
“Social media is great when used correcly, just that some use it just for the”…………… #power and #control