Hi guys, it’s been a while. I am forcing myself to come into my art studio where I write, without the TV on or any other interruptions and try to remove this writer’s block I’ve had for the last few months.
I had a little epiphany the other morning when getting out of the shower. (I told you, I have my best moments in there!) I guess it is because I have to be in my own head without the white noise that I like to hide in. Anyway, I was remembering how easy it was to take a bath or a shower as a kid, jump in and out and wahlah! Now, I move a little slower and notice more, the things like eye sight and other things not so fine tuned as they once were. But for a split second, almost magically, my eye sight really focused on something I was doing and seemed to become crystal clear without the help of my glasses since everything was foggy and they wouldn’t have helped. And this question popped in my head… What if God granted me one thing? IF I could choose anything to change about me, but it could only be just that one thing.
My eye sight? A sharper brain, where my memory would kick in more often? A body that is fit and healthy without the extra weight or pain in my back and neck after a recent accident? And then it occurred to me. There are people who would just be glad to have my eye sight or the ability to stand up and be able to walk like I can. Or a million other things that I complain about. I have friends that didn’t make it to this age where I am now. It made me realize that the one big thing I should choose to change is my attitude! And to be grateful for the things that I do have. And how in the blink of an eye, things could change. Things I’d treasure, and pray to have back if something happened to them. I do need to change that attitude… To not get so offended, or quick to anger.
As we approach the New Year, I am hesitant to try to turn over yet another “new leaf” because I’ve been doing that since I was a little girl. My dad used to tell me, I’d definitely have a forest with all of my “New Leaves!” He would sing me that little song about the girl with a curl and how nice and horrid she could be…
It kind of makes me sad that, I need yet another one. Why can’t I ever learn? I have written dozens of posts about my epiphanies and revelations, my AHA moments and plans to not be so negative. But it helps me to know that even Paul felt that way.
I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do.
So I am in good company. But I have to admit I am still a work in progress. Have you ever reread some of your own posts and realized that maybe you should take some of that advice you penned years ago? It’s funny, I went back through almost a decade of posts I’ve written here. I rewound and found some pretty inspiring stuff. That sure made it sound as if the author had her act together.